Tag Archives: Emotional Fitness Training Inc.

How to be a Gotcha War Winner

I learned about Gotcha Wars as a foster parent caring for troubled teens.  Many were dedicated Gotcha Warriors.  Why? The cartoon says it all.

Sad feeling fact: bullying usually begins with feeling weak or bad about yourself.

Second sad feeling fact:  bullying feels powerful.

Final sad feeling fact: bullying feels particularly powerful when you can get the other to behave badly.

Stay STrong

The main strategy for winning any Gotcha War involves minimal or no response. The less you engage someone wanting to fight, the less likely a fight will happen.

Not engaging, however requires strong self soothing skills.  So here are two poster coaches that help you create calm when someone wants you to rev up and fight.

Directions for the One Minute Meditation, an #emotionalfitnessexercise.

Soft face poster

Both these exercises need a bit of practice in order to be effective. Don’t expect them to work in the midst of a Gotcha War if you haven’t learned and practiced them before hand.

Thank you for all you do to Practice Kindness. Liking, commenting, or sharing any social media you find helpful is one way to be kind. It may seem like a little, however, doing a little matters a lot.


Thank you Kevin Spear  for the cartoon.

Inspired by a Wordpress  DAILY PROMPT  Showdown at Big Sky How do you handle conflict? Boldly and directly? Or, do you prefer a more subtle approach.  As noted above, Winning a Gotcha War demands a subtle approach.


Procrastination Leads to Best Work

Procrastination is the art of remembering what matters.  Knowing what matters is a key aspect of #Emotional Intelligence.

Put off all you can as long as you can.  Worry not as what needs to get done, gets done.

Thank you collegeessayorganizer.com for this image

This quick EFTI post is based on this Daily Prompt:   What’s your most productive time of day? When do you do your best work?

I was heading into my fifties when I realized I needed a bit of time pressure to do my best work; procrastination worked in my favor. This Poster Coach now sums up my views on the subject. It is one of EFTI’s  free poster coaches.

Seven Reasons to Procrastinate.


If procrastination makes you fret and fume, you have two choices. Stop procrastinating or strengthen your self-soothing skills.  Learning the art of Sloganeering helps with that. So here is another free Poster Coach.

Procrastinate as long as you can and as often as you can.

Thank you for all you do to Practice Kindness. Liking, commenting, or sharing any social media you find helpful is doing a little but matters a lot.



Stay Safe, But Take More Risks

Some risk takers over-do it. Why? Fear drives them. Hit a balance. Scared? Do a reality check. No physical danger? Plunge ahead. Danger: Call 911.

When to call 911

Emotions start in ancient and primitive fears connected to dangerous life and limb threats.  Important then, but overrated today.

For many all fears sound like 911 emergency sirens. Not knowing the difference keeps you from doing what is possible and being who you are.   Particularly fears related to internal feelings such as shame, embarrassment, or shyness.


All the research on dealing with sad, bad, or mad feelings indicates acting  against the feeling unless immediate danger threatens works best.  Acting against the feeling means doing the opposite of what the feeling tells you to do.

In the case of fear, the main message is run. Useful when an angry predator is looms on the path ahead of you, but even then standing your ground may work better. (Bears can outrun the fastest human, but might be scared by one who shows no fear.) To stay strong in the face of fear,  act bravely.

Here is another staying strong tidbit embedded in a big word – habituate – meaning “get used to.” The more risks you take, the more often you stand up to fear, the easier it becomes to take more risks.

As always thank you for all you do particularly for liking, commenting or sharing my posts.  Little things matter.


This post was somewhat inspired by this Word Press Daily Prompt:  Take a chance on me. What is the biggest chance you have taken? How did it turn out?


Freedom for all

This is Passover week. Passover celebrates the first recorded emancipation from slavery.  Whatever your religion working for freedom for all matters most.

Moses as politician

Thank you Findphotos.com


When we limit freedom to those we cherish, we enslave our hearts and souls. When we are silent in the face of oppression, we oppress all others.   Only when all work to protect liberty for all will there be Peace on Earth.

Thank you all for all you do to care and share with others. Doing a little matters a lot. Doing more matters more.


This post relates the Word Press Daily Prompt that asks: Tell us your funniest relationship disaster story. Not telling a funny one.  Passover is the story of straying from all that matters and that according to the Jewish God means pursuing Tikkun Olam which is Hebrew for repairing the world. Practicing deliberate kindness is how one pursues Tikkun Olam daily.

The tale of Passover is how straying from a loving relationship with the Source of all things dooms human kind.

This week’s free poster coach

freedom for all

links of interest



Linhird Rate Romance