Tag Archives: Life

How to Speak So the Deaf Can Hear

A Cranky Old Deaf One’s blog post, inspired by this Word Press Daily Prompt Challenge If you could  be fluent in any language  which would it be?

Hearing aide joke Emotional Fitness Thoughts

I laughed, hope you did. Also hope you thought a bit more about what mattered.

The language I would like to acquire would be “Lip Reading.” Then I would know who were my real friends, who liked to make jokes about other people, and who just cared about themselves.

On the other hand, it might just better to be a bit deaf to what is said and so  judge others by actions and not words. The Word Nazi’s promote divisiveness as much as peace.

The language I would like others to learn is American Sign Language.  It is so easy to learn even babies can learn some basic signs before they can talk.

Reality check: As easy as it is for baby’s to learn, once they begin knowing how to talk, that becomes their preferred language. I taught my grands some basic signs, but they lost interest as soon as they could talk. What I am seeing is that the grand nearing kindergarten age is getting a bit re-invested in signing.

So this blog post’s Emotional Fitness Tip is really a wish. That all day care and elementary schools would include signing as part of their curriculum. It is as important a second language as any other and more universal. Moreover, it is best taught via songs and that boosts emotional intelligence and fitness as well.

Then it could become an elective in all upper grades.

Think about this: skilled signers have little difficulty finding jobs, either full time or part time.

PARENTING TIPS

Parenting tip one: Encourage all to teach signing to children and reinforce it. 

Parenting tip two:  Of course that means you must learn to sign.

Parenting tip three:  When you have learned some signs have Signing Time every day at a specified time.  Meal time is a good time. So is making it part of a night time ritual. 

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Remember’s sharing is caring and the easiest way to practice kindness is to share this post if you found it helpful.  Share it even if it doesn’t speak to you, it will speak to some. Thank you.

Katherine

LINKS OF INTEREST

HOW TO FORGIVE – THE SECRET TO CARING

Whether it is caring for you or for another, you need to hone the skill of forgiveness.  All humans need to be forgiving and forgiven.

Forgiveness laughs

As you laugh, think about what matters.

Some things are unforgivable, but very few. When seeking to forgive your self and others, rate what you are seeking to forgive on a scale of ten.  Here’s mine:

  • Murder is at the top and = 10.
  • Killing another in self defense =9
  • Physical torture or assault = 8
  • Slavery = 7
  • Theft = 6
  • Betrayal and emotional abuse = 5
  • Name calling, harmful gossip,  and character assaults = 4
  •  Conflicting needs of yours that hurt another = 3
  • Unintentional emotional hurts and slights = 2
  • No hurts but to your conscience = 1

Debate flourishes around some of these. For example the question of slavery. Does the business world enslave people. Yes, and yet not the same as those held captive and forced to work against their will.

Another example? Excessive profit taking can be a form of theft, withholding help from the truly needy another form.

Betrayal, emotional abuse, name calling, harmful gossip, character assaults and on down are murkier.

To think more about universal morality, visit the Links of Importance  at the bottom of this post. .

Most of us do two things that make forgiveness more difficult. We awfulize the level 5 and below hurts that others impose on us.  Better to forgive as hanging on to such things only really hurts you. No one can hurt or emotionally abuse you without some consent on your part.

The second things we do about forgiving ourselves.  There we awfulize are small sins and feel like with have murdered another and often when they do not feel we have hurt them at all.

 PARENTING Thoughts

Parenting goes better if you practice forgiving yourself, your child, your other parent, and others who care.  Doing so models what matters.  It also helps to teach your child the art of apologizing. So make sure you apology properly and often when you hurt your child.

How to apology

 IMPROVE YOUR CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS

The heart of emotional intelligence is the ability to know what your heart tells you to do, but then partnering with your thinking skills so you make the best decision possible. I use Daily Prompts to help me think more critically.  Here’s today’s.

DAILY PROMPT Time Capsule:  What would you put in this year’s time capsule to channel the essence of our current moment for future generations?

Easy: Each generation needs to learn to practice kindness, forgiveness of others, forgiveness of self if there is to be peace on earth.

How would you answer this prompt?

Links of importance

FREE POSTER COACHES 

Don’t think you can afford a life coach? Like a life coach, EFTI’s poster coaches inspire, teach, motivate, and reinforce thinking about what matters.  To use, print up in color and post where it will be seen often.

Poster Coaches can also be used at family, staff meetings, in classes to motivate or spark discussions. Many are free.

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Keep working to stay strong, I work hard to do the same. Like daily physical fitness keeps you strong, practicing some Emotional Fitness Training Exercises keeps you emotionally strong. Forgiving others is one; forgiving yourself another.

Remember’s sharing is caring and the easiest way to Practice Kindness (an easy Emotional Fitness Exercise is to share this post if you found it helpful.  Thank you.

Katherine

ONE GREAT TIP FOR LETTING GO OF BETRAYAL

First love mixes lust and the heady feeling of finding someone who seems tp know your deepest self. As is said, “Love is blind” so love always betrays.

#emotionalintelligence #parentingtips #fitness

Desperately  seeking someone to affirm you keeps you running away from what could be. It is delusional  and twisted thinking.  We all need to get better at coding reality. 

Reality check: We are not capable of knowing all about ourselves and love ourselves unconditionally. It is delusional to expect others to be all affirming. 

Very few first loves survive the reality check of on-going life.  Romeo and Juliet’s love may not have died, but they did and who knows whether their love would have survived real life. Probably not.

A few people are lucky enough to live happily or mostly happily ever after with their first love.  Even then when one finally dies, the other feels betrayed.

Most of my friends married right out of high school or college. In high school, I planned to marry my first love after college. He found another and my heart broke.

Guess what?  I survived and endured a few more heart breaks before  I found Mr. Right. Moreover, he was often Mr. Wrong, but we fit together, were best friends, and had survived  enough fights to know we’d make it to old age together. By that time  I married, many of my married friends were divorcing were seeking other happy-ever- after mates. For many, the second marriage ended also.

I am grateful for the gift of my  first love, and  eventually also grateful for the heart-break and what it taught me.  Here are the lessons.

Even those who love you with all their hearts betray you. That’s life’s hardest lesson.  Babies are betrayed when parents cannot comfort the pain of colic; toddlers when parents can end terror of what lurks in the dark.

Teens wake up one day and believe  all adults have lied because the teen meets life head on and many things they were taught seem wrong. Some of those things:

  1. People who say they love you will never  hurt you.
  2. God is all loving and all powerful.
  3. Bad things don’t happen to good people not even to half good people.
  4. Your dreams will all come true if only you follow your heart and work hard.
  5. Love means always being understood and never having to say you are sorry.

The tip? Expect less you will be coding reality better.  Reality is a mixture of good and bad; what we know and what we cannot know.  The better we code reality, the less we will feel betrayed. As the author of the Microbe Hunters, Paul de Kruif noted, “Blessed are those who expect nothing for they shall not be disappointed.”

PARENTING TIP

Children’s brains are programmed to introduce the hard facts of life slowly; a child’s ability to deny and live in the moment is a protective gift of the Creator of All Things.  This means a parent must stay aware of age and stage to help the process of coding reality.  This parenting post discusses that in more detail.

THINK harder

The heart of becoming emotionally fit, what the gurus call Emotionally Intelligent, lies in thinking clearly.  Not easy for our emotions cloud our thoughts. I think harder by following some daily prompts. Here is today’s

FREE POSTER COACHES 

Don’t think you can afford a life coach? Like a life coach, EFTI’s poster coaches inspire, teach, motivate, and reinforce thinking about what matters.  To use, print up in color and post there it will be seen often.  Poster Coaches can also be used at  Family Meetings to start a discussion about what matters.

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Keep working to stay strong, I work hard to do the same . As noted above,  I am not perfect, no one is and this week;s post will be all about praising imperfection.

Remember’s sharing is caring and the easiest way to practice kindness is to share this post if you found it helpful.  Thank you.

Katherine

 

SIX TIPS TO MAKE AMENDS WHEN YOU FALL PREY TO PROPAGANDA – A SNEAKY HYPNOTISM POST

Ever post or quote something somewhere and then discover later your passion lead you into believing and sharing propaganda.  I just did. Shame on me.

Quotes about propaganda

What was my mistake? Sharing  a post on Facebook without fact checking it first. The post spoke to my heart and I was rushing and fact checking takes time.  Even after being called to task when I tried to  fact check  my efforts only revealed a partial story.

I was ashamed of myself, however. Shame always asks us to hide our flaws. What shame is supposed to do is to keep us from doing the unthinkable. Shame also asks us to hide, to sink from sight, and to keep our wrong doing secret.  Emotional intelligent gurus all say in most cases the way to deal with a negative feeling is to act against its urging.  In terms of shame that means not hiding and admitting when you did wrong.

How the deception worked in this case using a  picture from one story to get you to read a different second story.  The headline made it seem the picture was related to the second story and it was not.  Moreover, when I checked the second story it seemed that the facts in it possibly true, but it was impossible to ferret out the truth.  Sigh.

A friend who  had seen the original picture in their local newspapers and knew the story it related to corrected my version, and did so politely.  Others were not so polite.

Either way  I did what I should have done before sharing. I fact checked  and came up with the how I had let my passions lead me astray.  Then, I re-tracked the post and apologized.

Those who know me well , were supportive and I am grateful for their seeing the whole me and forgiving my mistake.

Tip one: The more your passions are aroused, the more you might be in Sneaky Hypnotism’s control.

Tip two: Practice forgiveness when you or another get caught in passing along propaganda. We all do.

Tip three: Be transparent about your bias.  Anyone who knows me knows I am passionately pro-Israeli and anti-violence. They should also know I do not think defending yourself from killer attacks is violence.

Tip four: Apologize when you err and that means retracking false information as well as saying you are sorry. 

Tip five: Make amends. This post is one of my efforts to do so.

Tip Six:  As always work to improve your critical thinking skills. 

IMPROVE YOUR THINKING SKILLS

Applying this WordPress daily prompt to today’s post   Easy Fix  – Write a post about any topic you wish, but make sure it ends with “And all was right in the world.”  See my answer at the bottom of this post.

PARENTING TIPs

Parenting tip one: Teach you children critical thinking skills and do so being aware of age and stage. This previous post details some ways to do that.

Parenting tip two: Teach your children to take responsiblity for their mistakes. Mistakes are for learning.

Parenting tip three: Teach your children to how to apologize,

Parenting tip four: Teach your children how to practice forgiveness.

Parenting tip five: Teach your children  how to  make amends. 

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Keep working to stay strong, I work hard to do the same . As noted above I often fail. I am not perfect, not one is and that is the subject of Monday’s blog post.

Katherine

LINKS OF INTEREST

FREE POSTER COACHES 

Don’t think you can afford a life coach? Like a life coach, EFTI’s poster coaches inspire, teach, motivate, and reinforce thinking about what matters.  To use, print up in color and post there it will be seen often.  Poster Coaches can also be used at  Family Meetings to start a discussion about what matters.

MY ANSWER TO THE  PROMPT  Easy Fix

Ending any activity with the hope that all will be right with the world is useful and dangerous.  Useful because it build hope and comforts. Dangerous because it can lead to ignoring and not working on what needs to happen to make wrongs right.