Tag Archives: Mental Health

CRY WHEN YOU MUST, THEN GO ON

This Poster Coach says it all.

How to survive trauma

All is change and feelings come and go often faster than NASCAR racers.  However, some bad  times will bring you to your knees or knock you  out. I call those times “Life blows,” the experts call them traumas.

Now is one of the three worse times of my life. Why? Not for sharing. However, the poster coach above tells how I survived the other two times and how I will continue surviving

When a life blow strikes you down, going on will be a struggle, but if you look back over your life, as I am doing, you will see you have survived the worse of times.  Honoring surviving past life blows strengthens your ability to go on.

Emotional training tip one: As you start to recover do what you can as you can. Hoever, be patient; time does not heal all wounds but ususally we mend enough in the broken places to go on.

Emotional training tip two:  As always take  good care of your body, Life blows weaken our physical beings making it essential to do all the things your mother and doctor say keep you healthy.

Emotional training tip three: Remember what matters. Life blows challenge our deepest beliefs.  Explains why there are no atheists in fox holes.

AND, if you ask agnostics and atheists why they turned  from religion; 99% will say because religion failed to explain bad things that happen. Some of the religious will become more devout.

My parents were more agnostic than not. I became a Christian as a teen, a non-Christian as a college student, and a Jew a year after I married.

One of the attractions of Judiasm was its lack of need to seek converts. I had turned away from Christianity because the emphasis on conversion did not match my idea of a loving God turning away from those who had found a different path to a being a good person defied my logical brain. I am grateful, Christians have given up killing in Jesus’ name and hope the fanatical Islamists do the same before they destroy the world.

Retirement has allowed me to study Torah more carefully.  It is studying philosophy as much as how to be an observant Jew.  I was a philosophy major in college and so love studying Torah and Judaism as a philosophy.  As I have often noted all philosophies, religions, and secular sages agree that what matters most is kindness to all.

Those who practice kindness to some are the current obstacles to peace on earth. Some are religious, many just power hungry, money hoarders, or  self-involved.  We all have power, money and selfish needs. Counter them by practicing deliberate kindness.

PARENTING TIP

Build good memories of the past for and with your child.  How? Laugh, play, and create together. Make one of your joint  creations a memory book. Include a few bad memories to accentuate the reality that life is not all good times. Those pages will also honor surviving.

CRITICAL THINKING DAILY PROMPT

This post was inspired by: But No CigarTell us about a time things came this close to working out… but didn’t. What happened next? Would you like the chance to try again, or are you happy with how things eventually worked out?

With each life blow, I kept trying. Never easy, but nothing else to do except die and I was not and am not ready for that. Mostly, I found lessons, and that was the good in each life blow.  I deepened my thinking about me, others, life, why pain, why evil, God.

Two tips for those whose life is one of constant physical or emotional pain.

Tip one: Make sure you are getting the best care possible. Emotional Fitness Tips augment, but do not replace competent professional help.

Tip two: One of the best sources of pratical help for both acute and chronic suffering is Marsha Linehan’s work, particularly her thoughts on Radical Acceptance. 

I was once accused of stealing her ideas, but that was before I had even heard of her.  The criticism pushed me to learn about her and to attend a training lead by her. I saw why I was thought to be plagerizing her and felt honored by the comparison.

STAY STRONG

The fact is when we suffer,  we are the ones who need to deal with it alone or with help from those who care and in some situations professionals.   Training seeks to help you stay strong.

Watch for my newest venture. Publishing short eBooks as PDF documents at my store. My other books will continue to be sold on my Amazon.com Author’s page.

This new venture is related to feeling the pressure of age and the on-going wish to share the  knowledge I and others have found useful.  Money makes self-publishing in a PDF format the only way I can  do that.

The books will not be perfect, dygraphia will interfere,  but each will be good as I can so without spending money.

As usual thank you for supporting me. I am so lucky so many of you are there for me.

Katherine

LINKS OF INTEREST

HOW TO SILENCE THE BAD BUZZING IN YOUR HEAD

Our self talk can lift us up or tear us down.  Silencing the negative buzzing improves your emotional intelligence.

How to turn self-talk into useful slogans.

Emotional fitness tip

Pick a slogan that lifts you up and repeat it every time you become aware of negative buzzing.  Also repeat it every time you answer your phone or text a message. Repetition is necessary to counter the long practiced strength of negative buzzing.

PARENTING TIP

Find some affirmative slogans you can use with your kids. The more you use them, the better.

CRITICAL THINKING DAILY PROMPT

This quick post was inspired by this Daily Prompt. Fly on the Wall:  If you could be a “fly on the wall” anywhere and at any time in history, where and when would you choose?

Do you see how that lead me to thinking about the buzzing in our head?  If I hadn’t read it, I would not have posted today.

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Remember’s sharing is caring and the easiest way to practice kindness now is to share this post with someone who will find it inspiring.  Thank you.

Katherine

 LINKS OF INTEREST

POLITICAL JOKES: LAUGH OR CRY

Asked to post a joke, I could not resist a few jabs at politicians. And yes, some are honest and caring; but good  jokes make you think clearly as well as laugh.

POLITICAL LAUGHS

Hope you found something to chuckle and think about. Stay strong, not easy in our politicized world.

 PARENTING TIP

Kids of all ages love jokes.  Laughing together bonds.  When kids start reading, you can begin helping kids think about the meaning behind the jokes.  Also important to keep jokes kind.

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Remember’s sharing is caring and the easiest way to practice kindness now is to share this post with someone who will find it inspiring.  Thank you.

Katherine

LINKS OF INTEREST

 FREE POSTER COACHES 

Like any coach, EFTI’s poster coaches inspire, teach, motivate, and reinforce thinking about what matters.  To use, print up in color and post there it will be seen often.  Poster Coaches can also be used at  Family Meetings to start a discussion about what matters.

DAILY PROMPT

Ha Ha Ha Tell us a joke! Knock-knock joke, long story with an unexpected punchline, great zinger — all jokes are welcome!

So given my feelings about the current state of political affairs here and abroad, I decided to pick on politicians. I don’t ordinarily like jokes that poke fun at a specific group of people. Over generalizing. However, thought I would be forgiven for this.

CHOOSE KINDNESS AND YOU ALWAYS WIN

Life is hard and not matter how much we are given, we all know pain and struggle. Surviving those times is easier than you think.

vfrankel

Vickor Emil Frankl lost his wife, father, mother, and brother  during the Holocaust. He survived to became a major force in the development of  existential therapym  which stresses facing reality, but choosing what you can, and noting that the best choice is always kindness.  He  is most remembered for his book Man’s Search for Meaning, from Death Camp to Existentialism. 

Emotional Fitness exercise of the day

Practicing Kindness is one of the Twelve Easy Emotional Fitness Exercises. Make it your life’s mission and you will survive the worse. Do so, not for those you treat with kindness but for you.

Being kind to others almost always gets repaid with kindness.  Smile at someone and most of the time you will get a smile in return.  When you don’t, at least you have done the right thing.  Giving and getting kindness is essential to your health.

Parenting Tip

Kindness starts with respect for others and for children and that is the heart of good manners.  Manners can be taught as soon as your child starts walking and talking.

As Marion Wright Edelman, president and founder of the Children’s Defense Fund noted,  “Being considerate of others will take you and your children further in life than any college or professional degree.”

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Keep working to stay strong, I work hard to do the same . As noted above,  I am not perfect, no one is so see mistakes as an opportunity for learning.

Remember’s sharing is caring and the easiest way to practice kindness right now is to share this post with someone who will find it inspiring.  Thank you.

Katherine

Links of interest

 FREE POSTER COACHES 

Like any coach, EFTI’s poster coaches inspire, teach, motivate, and reinforce thinking about what matters.  To use, print up in color and post there it will be seen often.  Poster Coaches can also be used at  Family Meetings to start a discussion about what matters.

DAILY PROMPT  Study Abroad  If you were asked to spend a year living in a different location, where would you choose and why?

Israel. Because I am a Jew. Because despite all the horrors of Jew hatred and the efforts to destroy Israel, Israel survives as a democratic. Because the heart of Jewish Law is to treat others as you want to be treated and that is the heart of practicing kindness.