Doubt All Experts

Doubt is necessary in the search for wisdom.

Thinking we know all about something, thinking the experts know all closes our minds to other possibilities. Expert knowledge is limited knowledge. It should not rule our hearts.

Jerome Kagan, Harvard’s top researcher into human behavior, points out that uncertainty also known as doubt drives who we are and how we think almost as much as the our survival and sexual needs. Once those needs are met, we seek comfort in our most treasured beliefs.

He points out that doubt lives behind many of our more negative feelings depending on who we blame for making us doubt something.

  1. We feel anger if we blame another for making us doubt; the cause of the anger attached to religious and political views.
  2. We feel shame or quilt when we blame ourselves for feeling uncertain.
  3. We feel despair, if we can find nothing to blame.

Emotional Fitness Tips

Tip one: Own your core beliefs as beliefs not facts. Religious faith is based on belief in what cannot be proved.  Holds true for most of what we cling to without doubt.

Think about the faith we use when walking across a room, out on the sidewalk, or along a garden path. But the brute facts remain, floors may collapse, sidewalks crumble, and the garden path suddenly sink.

Tip two: Allow others their most cherished beliefs.  Maybe they are right, maybe you are right, maybe both of you are right.

Tip three: Fear the rule makers, particularly the religious rule makers.  Rule makers tend to by tilted toward the mental disorder called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. These are ruled by both fear and the desire to control everything.

Fear is a part of life – we are programmed to stay safe by learning to fear what hurts us. However, most Our brains think every fear is a 911 call, and wants us to respond as if our lives were threatened. Not helpful or we run away from somethings unnecessarily or fight when fighting is not necessary.

The rule makers think rules will keep them safe, but only if everyone obeys. Think about how some rule makes think women’s immodest dress causes men to rape. Most rape are power driven not desire driven. Nevertheless, the rule makers with power over women seek to control what women wear.

Tip four: Actions matters, thoughts are just thoughts. Beliefs influence actions, but are not the same. There is no doubt that a sexily dressed woman might cause a man to think lusty thoughts. As former president Jimmy Carter confessed, “I have sinned in my heart, because I have lusted after women other than my wife.”  Sinning in your heart is not sinning in the real world. Sadly, some rule makers have found that condemning sinful thoughts gives them more power over those who strive to be sin free.

Tip five: Realize we are all flawed. One of the main messages of the Old Testament – the Torah of the Jews – is that all humans are flawed. Adam and Eve left paradise because they ate the forbidden fruit. Moses stuttered, he defied God. King David lusted after Bathsheba.

Tip six: Act only what matters.  What matters is learning to calm your fears and angers so you act wisely, meaning acting to make the world better.

Need to improve yourself soothing skills? My eBook: Self-Soothing To Create Calm in Your Life will help more than a cuppa of tea or a glass of wine and costs less. You can find the link to buying it by going to the Books on Amazon at the top of the page.

Thank you for all you do

Remember to share all you find of value on the internet.  All who post crave recognition. A like says “Thank You.” Comments say you have read and thought about the post. Sharing is a gift to three people: the blogger, the people you share with, and you for your kindness bless you.

Katherine

Post Inspiration: This post was inspired by inspired by WordPress Daily  One Word Prompt: Expert.

Go here to learn more about the Daily Prompts.

Links of Interest

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

 

I’m Back

Staying strong

All my blog posts are back. You may recall when I switch to a new host a month and half were lost. Grateful the posts have been recovered.

I am still in the process of learning to add a store to my blog, so still not running at full steam yet.  But progress matters most in most things, particularly as you age. Thank you for you patience.

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Remember to share all you find of value on the internet.  All who post crave recognition. A like says “Thank You.” Comments say you have read and thought about the post. Sharing is a gift to three people: the blogger, the people you share with, and you for your kindness bless you.

Katherine

LINKS OF INTEREST

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

Thank you.

Carry On, I Will Return

Staying strong

Off for a brief while. Aging is not always an easy road to follow as all will learn. Enjoy and be grateful for all you have been given. Will return as soon as I can;  meanwhile, stay or get strong. I am trying the later.

POST INSPIRATION

This post was inspired by WordPress Daily  One Word Prompt: Carry and minor health problem.

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Remember to share all you find of value on the internet.  All who post crave recognition. A like says “Thank You.” Comments say you have read and thought about the post. Sharing is a gift to three people: the blogger, the people you share with, and you for your kindness bless you.

Katherine

LINKS OF INTEREST

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

Thank you.

Confusion – A Sneaky Hypnotic Sales Ploy

Sales people use tools borrowed from the hypnotists. Confusion is one. Here are others:

 
Information about hypnisis as a sales tool. .

How does confusion work as a hypnotic tool? Because we are genetically programmed to want to make sense of our world, when confused we focus more intently and hypnosis is all about focus.

Trances are focus intense states. Get lost in a book? You are in a trance state.Get lost in your thoughts while driving or riding a familiar route, you are trancing.

How does this related to selling something? Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) is an approach to selling  developed by two hypnotists, Richard Bandler and John Grinder. Because lots of people are afraid of hypnotism they started calling what they did by a more scientific sounding name.  NLP while not scientifically credited continues to be marketed by companies that organize NLP seminars and workshops on management training for businesses, particularly companies training sales people.

Hypnosis is not a magical mind control tool. You cannot be forced to do something you do not want to do. Where the danger lies is a hypnotist being able to link his control to one of your desires.

The people who a stage hypnotist can turn into clucking chickens is trained to see people who are easily  hypnotized. Yes, it is a talent like any other talent and some people are very easily hypnotized while others can rarely be induced to trance out. The more you know about hypnotism, the more you can protect yourself from those interested in getting you to do their bidding.

The Good News? 

Recognizing confusion can push you to think more critically.

Emotional Fitness Tips 

Tip one: Learn more about  hypnosis and how sales people use it to get you to buy. Go to the New Think Tank Blog post to see what you are up against. Read all his posts for a mini-course on hypnosis. It will better prepare you to avoid the lure of the Sneaky Hypnotists.

Tip Two: Use all advertising to train yourself to spot the uses and abuses of hypnosis.

Tip Three: Type Sneaky Hypnosis in this blog’s sidebar Search  Tool and read my other posts about Sneaky Hypnosis.

You need heart and brain working together to be the Wizard of the Good Life and not fall prey to suggestions you need something you don’t.

Parenting tip

The younger your child, the more easily s/he can be hypnotised. Moreover, properly taught, hypnosis can increase your child’s Emotional Intelligence. It starts with teaching them to meditate a bit.

Daniel Goleman, the guru of Emotional Intelligence suggests in this video teaching pre-schoolers  about Breathing Buddies.

Goleman calls trance states Mindfulness as do many other people. By any name trance, states can divide you from reality which can be soothing, but dangerous if you do not understand how others can divide your heart and brain, so you do things you regret.

Go here for a parenting post with more tips designed to protect your child from becoming a victim of Sneaky Hypnotism.

POST INSPIRATION

This post was inspired by WordPress Daily  One Word Prompt: Confusion.

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO

Remember to share all you find of value on the internet.  All who post crave recognition. A like says “Thank You.” Comments say you have read and thought about the post. Sharing is a gift to three people: the blogger, the people you share with, and you for your kindness bless you.

Katherine

LINKS OF INTEREST

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.